“And Such Is Life…”

In the recent passing of my godfather; when extending my condolences to his family and my godmother, she so eloquently put this horrible ordeal in a phrase that eased my mind and my heart… “And such is life”.

I have been to handfuls of funerals throughout my life, I remember being dragged to funerals and prayer services when I was young to whom I didn’t even know or recognize… my parents would tell me ,”oh, you know Lolo/Lola/ Tito/Tita (insert name here) they are so and so’s aunt, cousin… relative”. And it was always a big thing for Filipinos too… there’s the prayer service continued by food, and then the funeral service also continued by food and then the 40 days celebration... again continued by food and you would always see people from the Filipino community that you haven’t seen in months or years; all who are there to commemorate the life of the deceased.

I recall the first funeral that I went to... that I actually knew the person, my Grandpa Santiago, Ago for short; we drove all the way to Seattle, WA. My Aunt, whom I consider more like a cousin, because she is so young, was super upset when my parents and relatives started taking pictures… and making us stand by the casket and took more pictures… I think it’s a Filipino thing… anyways I was in Jr. High and ever since I was a toddler we made constant trips to the US and Seattle was more than often a stop that we would make. I remember my Ate Sonya brought us to where they sell the caskets and urns and such, and I vividly remember the cheapest casket of them all – a cardboard box – I don’t think they would bury people in that, more so for cremation… or at least I would hope so! They also had little containers/viles that could be worn around your neck, which holds a lock of your loved ones hair. Just recently I have seen the handprints or finger prints that can be set in a pendent which also would be worn around the neck, the latter idea I think is neat.

My Grandpa Ago had served some time in the US Military and just like in the movies they had the Trumpet playing “taps”, preceded by the 3-volley Salute and then they presented my Grandma Corazon, or Azon for short, the American Flag that laid across his casket… it was beautiful and has a left an impression in my mind and heart till this day.

Derek, my husband, hasn’t had the privilege or the desire to attend very many funerals. I’m actually glad that my parents brought me along and that I got to experience every single one of them; I’m not saying that it makes it easier… because it doesn’t, by any means… I still cry at every single one that I attend. I think, however, that it helps me to accept what’s happened and has helped me to learn how to deal with the uncomfortable and sometimes unbearable situation.

Which brings me to the words of my Godmother, Ninang Linda, “and such is life”… everything is given life, sometimes it is certain how long that person, animal, organism has to live, but it is the circle of life that one day that person, animal, organism will meet its demise. For us that believe in a greater god, we will live in a kingdom among all that we have survived…

rest in peace.